Blessed is thy name

If you had to use one word to describe Cheeku, it had to be "aaa ummm" (jha term for the non existence of a single word description). Cheeku was his pet name and surprisingly he loved it and knew that he would love it irrespective of his age. It was not the charm that the name offered, instead it was the escapist in him which put that name on such a high pedestal. His parents had named him David Imaandaar and he thought that they had screwed him big time, without even deriving any sadistic pleasure out of it. If he ever knew that Shakespeare had once said, "What's in a name", I am sure that he would have wanted to bring back Shakespeare from dead and beat him to death.

He would have asked William to face the maniac children around him. They would use his name to mock him every single moment of his childhood. Kids are brash and they need something to bully other kids and have fun. Unfortunately for David, the kids didn't even need to be creative for their recreation. It was so out there that they couldn't miss it. While David and Imaandaar would have been alright names on their own in different parts of the world, the combination spelled doom. They teased him no matter what he did and wherever he went. This put extra pressure on Imaan than the Chaganlals of the place to excel in anything he undertook 'cause he had to go a step further to offset the 'name effect'. So, he fought hard and took nothing for granted. He was not a naturally gifted individual, but he made amends for it by being extremely diligent and nbdu (the opposite of chilled out).

As his peers grew up, their mockery toned down in volume. But, it still had an acerbic touch to it or so thought David. He had to be extremely good at something to shut them up once and for all. He had to make them see the white shining circle behind his head ( he saw too many Hindi mythological series). He had tried all the things that were there to try and didn't feel great about anything. He had to change the game. One day he was very tired from his daily chores (he was working out like a maniac) and was strolling along the shore of the neighborhood lake. He noticed that the wave currents were very strong and felt as if it was mocking him, challenging him to face its fury. He walked along for some time ignoring it, but then there was this sudden impulse and he just dove in. He swam against the current and slowly but steadily reached the other side. It was a good 2 mile length and he was almost dead by the time he reached the shore. He then looked at the waves and let out a mocking smile (something inside his head said, Dude you have been reading Ayn Rand a bit too much. Who the fuck laughs at waves). He was suddenly interrupted by a realization. He was so tired that it was difficult to focus. He took a stone and tried to aim it on a small log of wood floating in the water. It seemed much harder than normal and at that instant he knew what the game should be and how he would make the Apsaras rain flowers on him (too much Ramanand Sagar, no?)

------------TO BE CONTINUED--------------------------------------------------------------

Bad Ass rules

Jane: Why wouldn't you go out with me? I think I am perfectly fine.

Harry: Oh, thats your self projection. To me, you are incredibly stupid and irritable. I admit that you have a fine body, but you don't have a personality which attracts me.

Jane: You are such a cruel, heartless man. I haven't met anyone so mean.

Harry: Oh yeah, thats my USP. Would it hurt less if I just said I was with someone else?

Jane: Probably!

Harry: Thats why I didn't say it (though it was the truth). I wanted you to be brave and be able to face any shit that comes your way. After all you need that more than my stupid love (coz u r so damn stupid)

Jane: You are so cool. I still want you/

Harry: Who doesn't? Get over it chic.

Jane: But I can do anything for you.

Harry: But, what can you possibly do for me? You are so inane, that even donkeys feel proud in your company. Maybe I will just make out with you, so that you can remember it for the rest of your life and feel happy about it?

Jane: I am not stupid Mr. But, yeah pls kiss me.

Kuch to kariye Jha Ji

Jaane kahan khona chahta hai

pyaar mai pagal hona chahta hai

aksar bujha bujha sa rehta hai par

aur bolta hai, kuch to kariye Jha Ji

anokha sa kuch likhna chahta hai

kabhi suron ke saath khelna chahta hai

kewal wazan hi utha pata hai par

aur bolta hai, kuch to kariye Jha Ji

paani mai gotey lagana chahta hai

madhosh hoke kabhi jhoomna chahta hai

chalna hi naseeb hai par bichare ko

so bolta hai, kuch to kariye Jha Ji

acchi si aawaz mai gungunana chahta hai

haseen labon ko choomna chahta hai

bewajah ki baatein hi kar pata hai par

aur bolta hai, kuch to kariye Jha Ji

Moh maya ke jaal se nikalna chahta hai

chaddar taanke aaram se sona chahta hai

khoob aalas mai din guzarta hai

aur bolta hai, kuch naa kariye Jha Ji.

Waah Ustaad Waah - Part 1

I have decided to document the good music that I discover. I am listening to all kinds of music on Pandora and want to keep a record of the stuff I like. While, ideally I would like to automate it. For now, I am just gonna type it out manually. Ugh, I am such a shady programmer :(

So, today was the day for Flamenco based western classical and here are some of the compositions I liked:

Solear by Manolo Sanlucar

Bronce Gitano by Sabicas

Canastero by Gypsy Kings

Luzia (Siguiriya) by Paco De Lucia

Entre Olas by Juan Serrano (from the OST of Vicky Christina Barcelona)

The Afternoon is Sweetness by Vincente Amigo

Gua'iras De Lucia by Paco De Lucia

Mr Tang by Rodrigo Y Gabriela

Taconeo Gitano by Sabicas

Oriente Mediterraneo and De Mi Corazon Al Aire by Vincente Amigo

Cranada En Flor by Paco Pena

Well. now you see why I had to document it. There is no way in hell, I would be able to remember those names. Anyway the list is crude. Just a reminder for me to check them out again. If anyone reads this, it would be great if you can suggest some other music in this genre which you think is good.

Safar

Lambi si sadak thi koi

naam kisi ko yaad na tha,

bas thande se pairon pe

chalte rehna ek dastoor sa tha.

saamp saa kabhi tedha medha

toh sui si kabhi seedhi

gusse ki tarah tez

toh pyaar sa kabhi bhola

safar ke saare rang the ye

yaa unke chalne ke dhang the ye

mausam dhundla raha tha

yaa ankhein dagmaga rahin thi

khush ho jaate paas ke manzar se

ghaas ki hariyali yaa jharne ki kilkaari se

sannata bhi lekin door nahi rehta

jab aata garam ret ya bimaar khet.

chalte rehte hain lekin woh musafir

rukte, thakte par kabhi naa haarte

lambi si sadak pe koi

shayad zindagi kehke jisey pukarte.

Chapter 3 - Swim or Die

It was a close call last time and AJ was furious that his life was such a stupid script. Boredom had brought him to India, but the adventure was a bit too much to handle. He would probably look back and cherish the near death experience when he was old and playing saamp-seedi (the besht board game ever) with his friends on his porch, but for now he needed to break a leg and have some (wheat) beer. So, he took out his iPhone and started looking for clubs around him. The screen read "Really?" with 2 tap-on boxes "Hell Yeah" and " Gotcha, I am so funny". AJ was irritated and tapped the first box. He was greeted with a massive virtual boxing punch of max intensity and the screen read "Dobara mat poochna!". He was about to smash the iPhone on ground, when he looked around and had an "Aha" moment. He had teleported into another small village (Rampur again). No wonder, his phone couldn't find a club around and so was playing with him. But, he really needed to have a good time and suddenly Sunny Paaji's voice started playing in his head "Khoob jamega rang jab mil baithenge 3 yaar. Aap, mai aur bagpiper club soda". So, off he went to Sunny paaji's house.

The paaji mansion was huge with 40 feet cutouts of suny paaji ravaging the goons with his handpump and romancing the chics in his truck. There was a loud-speaker lying on the couch and the genius AJ was, he immidiately understood the protocol. He picked it up and started announcing, "Baa mulayaza hosiyaar, jalaludin fikratuh blah blah blah, sher-e-sultanat blah AJ haazir ho rahe hain". Sunny paaji arrived to receive his guest with a garland in one hand and a scotch in another. AJ used to write to Sunny Paaji and having a nobel laureate as a fan made Paaji extremely happy. Paaji also understood why this man was called a genius. He had inferred the protocol of the house just by looking at the loud-speaker. "waah waah" was on his mind. After initial pleasantries, the 3 of them sat down so that "rang jam sakey". AJ was very tired and so he was high in no time and he started saying/blabbering, "Paaji bas ek regret reh gaya hai, saali buoyancy ke baare mai kitaab padh daale, lekin swimming nahi seekh paaya..ha-he.he-he."

Paaji was a very sentimental man. Unse kisika dard nahi dekha jaata tha. So, he just grabbed Aj's collar and said, "Jo dar gaya, samjho mar gaya" and threw him in a pond near his mansion (Yeah not pool, pond jahan sab gulty hero/heroines go and cry). The pond had crocs, aligators etc and AJ was freaked out of his drunk mind. Why would Paaji try to kill him. Faced with death, all the buoyancy lessons started to work in practice. The scotch was also lending a hand. He started swimming slowly, but he was still scared. Surprisingly, the alligators were slower than him. He somehow came back to the land and saw paaji smiling. He was like wtf man, I could have died there. Paaji said, "tumhare darr ko nikalne ka aur koi tareeka nahi tha. Ye alligators to mere pets hain, ye sirf kutton (bad guys) ko khate hain". Ye sunke, AJ started shedding "khushi ke aansoo" and then both the guys broke into an awesome bhangra number with the bg music playing 'Ye dosti hum nahi chodenge"

Part Doux

He felt nauseated the moment things turned into solid matter. He had to throw up and his eyes started looking for a garbage bin, toilet whatever. The brain can function only for so long when its running out of oxygen. Soon, everything turns into a blur and whatever is all your brain can say. So, AJ threw up in whatever was lying ahead and after he was done he saw what that thing was. It was a man's plate of food in which his vomit had taken shelter (ewww). He raised his gaze above the plate (freck, freck, double freck was on his mind) and could see a big shell-shocked family looking right at him. They instantly started cursing him in Telugu (well if you thought Rampur was only in North India, you are in for a surprise maytt). Now, AJ was not used to profanity, all he heard was compliments all his life and he didnt understand the language. So, for a moment he thought that they were greeting him when suddenly one strong punch cracked his jaw (Man I tell you, these nobel laureates are real slow when it comes to real life). He now understood that no good can come from vomitting on food and bham a belan hit his head and knocked the bajesus out of him (Lesson 1 from Des: Whatever you do, start running for your life first, analyze later or the aunty will hunt you down with her belan. Why dont they have a knock out by belan event in Olympics?).

When AJ regained consciousness, he initially thought that he was in a sauna or something. Everything felt warm, but gradually things became hot and by the time he fully came into his senses it was a nightmare. He was hung from a tree and there was fire burning beneath him. His inability to fine tune teleportation was the root cause of all this. First he came to the wrong village and secondly he had to throw up soon after landing. When would he get used to this form of travel. It was like the inventor of gun shooting himself just because he forgot to point the barrel in the right direction. Anyway, he was still hopeful that the villagers were all involved in a practical joke. They wouldnt burn a man for a small offense. But when he heard the villagers cheering enthusiastically (an item song called "A ante amlapuram" started playing) and lowering him down that he realized his life was about to end in a very painful manner. All kinds of frames started rolling through his mind. Well, it was actually a static frame (An image of a daily having "Nobel Laureate fired towards Nobel" as its frontpage headline). But suddenly he realized what a dumbass he was, sorry not dumbass a genius. He could teleport and so whuff he was gone in a flicker.

Author's note: The village was not as insane as it seemed to be. Actually, they were pretty modern. They knew who AJ was and had a deep respect for him. But, they knew that sometimes people who have everything seem to forget how to cherish their life. These villagers had recently watched "The Game" and thought of doing the entire fire routine to give some near death chills to the great AJ and maybe rejuvinate him. He had seemed pretty washed out off late. So, thats for now, this piece will continue (oh man that sucks!) for many more weeks to come. Tab tak dil thaam ke rakhiye aur suniye laddu laal meena ki taraf se ye pyaar bhara geet:

Some story I say

Everybody said that AJ is the man. Whenever AJ entered a party, it was as if everything stood still. Fresh oxygen poured in from nowhere in a room full of smoke(well it was a no smoking room and the oxygen was everywhere, but this is how AJ wants to put it and he has a gun). All the chics just converged towards him without any provocation. The guys were enamored too. There was something about him. A fast peppy number started playing and AJ spit out his unlit cigarette into the air and broke into a magical move. It was as if this dance sequence and the song were meant for each other. People watched in appreciation and chipped in with their own master mix (like someone clapped, another chic whistled and a punjabi munda said balle balle..jo bole sonihaal). As the song came to an end, AJ settled into a climactic pose, opened his mouth and caught a cigarette. It had huge flames all over it. Chics screamed in panic. AJ raised his hands to calm the people(all the people lifted their hands to emulate AJ) and said "daffs wds tff haet" (everybody repeated the blabber). He then blew a cool puff of air to extinguish the fire. Everybody said "waoooo" and there were hi-fis all around. AJ took the ciggi out and said "Gadhon, mai keh raha tha the dance was too hawt isliye ciggi mai aag lag gayi. I wasnt blabbering". On hearing this, the desi junta had an aa-haa moment and lowered their hands. The phirang junta heard something exotic and so were mesmerized and started dancing. Aisa tha apna AJ. He was the real heart and soul of any party (btw the sales of non-tobacco mint ciggi had grown exponentially kyunki apna AJ smoke nahi karta bhai but showoff to karta hai).

When AJ was not partying he used to tame science, lift weights as if they were made of hay and play sports blindfolded. Things were way too easy for him. Women came without any effort, booze was always bought by someone else and awards/scientific memos were given by morons who knew nothing. All this was amazing when he had initially come to the US from India. But now, he was really missing his days in Des where he was just one in a billion (literally). He had to struggle for things and used to get conned all the time in Delhi. So, he decided to leave this place for a while and go back to his roots. He was spontaneous and so he instantly teleported to a small village in India. (Flight journey was so freakin painful that AJ had worked on teleportation and made it a reality. Yes, he received a Nobel Prize for it. He teleported to Stockholm for the ceremony). Unfortunately, the village was not what he had in mind (He thought of Rampur, but there are so many bloody Rampurs) . But what the hail, a village is a village so he decided to stay on for some time.

Voice of the author: Now that the character development of the assumed protagonist has been done and the story initiated, I will take a break and try to give the story some twists the next time I get drunk. Tab tak tum bhi kar lo twist pakad ke kisi ki wrist.

Sahi??

Raah mai chalte chalte kabhi ruk jaata hoon

sochne lagta hoon manzil ke baare mai

agar kamyaab ho gaya to kya hoga,

kaise badal jayegi zindagi

Sab kuch kitna sahi sa hoga

Lekin agar wahan nahi pahunch paaya

toh kaunsi nahi raah pe nikloonga

manzil kitni badal jayegi aur koi manzil hogi bhi ya nahi

ye khayal bhi foot padta hai

Kahaniyan sunate hain kai log

jisme sab kuch ekdam accha ho jaata hai anth tak

par jahan woh kahani khatam hoti hai

wahan koi aur bhi to shuru hoti hogi

sabke liye to woh kahani ek si khatam nahi hoti

fir kis anth ko dekh kar khush ho jaate hain hum

peeche mud ke dekhta hoon abhi tak ke safar ko

to yaad aati hain woh choti choti khusiyaan, 

chote chote gham jo us samay pahad jaise bade lagte the

har kamiyabi ek naya sooraj aur har nakami maut ka gehra kuan lagta tha

par waqt ke saath sabka aakaar chota pad jaata hai

toh fir kyun sochna ki kya sahi hoga aakhir mai

aandhi mai udte hue kagaz ki tarah

udne ka mazaa lo naaki doobne ubarne ka khayal

poem on the bus

The metro buses here in Seattle have short poems written on them, so that people can read poems when they have nothing else to do and are staring aimlessly anywhere and everywhere. I happen to read most of them not because I have nothing to do, but because I admire beautiful things :)

Happened to read this short and sweet poem today. Hopefully I can reproduce it or I can blame it on age and crack a cheap joke about loss of memory. So here it goes:

If night`s stone in the street is shining
Polished an oil-brown dazzle by rain
Sheet me in silk and sail me to China
or slip me in linen and mail me to Spain

But when the springs pink in the cherry tree leaps
Rain blossom all day and pillow my sleep.

Hmmm not deep and all, but is sweet and even though I am very busy, I thought I will put it up :)

General

Wanted to pen down some of the things I listened to/read in the past few days. Didnt know where to put it. Hopefully will keep on editing this same post in the future:

Sometimes the best way to deliver a punch is to step back..But step back too far and you aint fighting at all - Million Dollar Baby

The body knows what fighters don't: how to protect itself. A neck can only twist so far. Twist it just a hair more and the body says, "Hey, I'll take it from here because you obviously don't know what you're doing... Lie down now, rest, and we'll talk about this when you regain your senses." It's called the knockout mechanism - Million Dollar Baby

There were many other awesome quotes, but I will keep it at those two for now.

Then there is this beautiful poem by Gulzar (got it from Srivani) which I keep on listening to these days. It is called Bauchaar and it is one of the 10 poems he had written for Dus Kahaniyan. Here it goes:

mai kuch kuch bhoolta jaata hun ab tujhko
tera chehra bhi ab to dhundlane laga hai ab kahyal mein
badalne lag gaya hai ab wo subah shaam ka mammool
jisme tujhse milne ka bhi ek mamool shamil tha
tere khat aate rehte the
to yaad rehta tha mujhe tere aawaz ke surkhiyan
tere aawaz ko kaagaz pe rakhke maine chaha tha ki PIN kar lun
wo jaise titliyon ke par laga leta hai apne ALBUM mein
tere be ko daba kar baat karana
wa par hoton ka challa
gol hokar ghoom jata tha
bohot din ho gaye dekha nahi
na khat mila koi
sachhi bohot din ho gaye
teri aawaz ki bauchaar mein bhiga nahin hun mai

सवाल

आज इक्षा हुई की एक कविता लिखूं। तो ये रही एक चोट्टी सी कोशिश

लब बंध गए हैं क्यूँ
वक्त थम सा गया है
चाहे जितने भी कर लूँ जतन
ये आंसू छलक जाते हैं क्यूँ

ये रात लगे इतनी घनघोर क्यूँ
हवा भी इतनी सहमी है
चांदनी भी ठंडक नही देती
जाने है ये अजीब हलचल क्यूँ

छाया है एक बादल मन मैं
है निराशा मैं या है सूनेपन मैं
ढूँढता है ये क्या बावरा
की चुभते हैं हमेशा कांटें पैरों मैं

व्यर्थ मैं है इतना सन्नाटा क्यूँ
खुशी का कोई न कोई बहाना है
ग़म की परछाई से निकलो
ऐसा फ़िर खुदको समझाता है क्यूँ

हर बार होती है यही कशमकश क्यूँ
हूँ मैं इतना नासमझ
या है सच मैं खालीपन प्रबल
ये उठता है हमेशा सवाल क्यूँ

Fly away with my rope

If a normal movie transformed into a real scenario, what would the extras be like. In terms of numbers, they are far more than the key characters. So, they are probably meant to portray the "Aam Janta". But then why are they so lame. The extras in the bad ass gang must have the lowest possible self esteem. The moment they see the hero, they start missing their gunshots. The hero or any of his/her family members and friends (even aunties and unkools) bash them up as if they were a bunch of misbehaving 8 yr olds who call to be spanked. Dude if they were so bad in beating up people, why the hell are they getting paid to be musculed goons (But then I too get paid for writing lousy code)

They look as if they are ready with the idea "Abe ye hero aa gaya, ab to hawa mai mast goli chalate hain and jaise hi woh trigger dabeyega bhaag ke seene mai ek goli khate hain and udd jaate hain". At second thought that seems like fun. You get to fire shots in the air and then fly on a rope. Unless ofcourse Sunny paaji is the hero. If that happens they have to run or die even if he shouts/screams or even farts.

ok so I think it would be good if someone actually makes an extra bash up a hero/superhero and then rubs it in by saying saala hero hai to kya kuch bhi karega and then crack a dialogue with punch like ghode pe sawari karte karte tatuon pe chadhna bhool gaye baabumoshai? ok so that was a bad one, but I had to get it out of my system.

Shrill to kill

A & B were having a very intense technical discussion on how to solve some major problem in their Windows project. Then this conversation followed :
A : Wait a min. I heard this song "High and dry" on radio after a long time and it has been playing in my head since.
B: So???wtf man
A: Its by Radiohead
B(expression of a tubelight and it glows finally): oooooo Eureka dood..Thats y the band called themselves Radiohead (followed by a Eureka Hi-fi all around)
A: Now that we have solved the bigger problem, we know that the solution to this stupid problem in Windows will occur to us similarly and so lets head home
B: Absolutely.
So, really this song was playing in my head and I just wanted to sing those high pitch lines (Higggggggh, dryyyyyy ones), but couldn't do that in office. Was weared down by the morose day and headed to the gym after work. Pumped some iron, adrenaline was produced in loads today and I was like totally high and excited. Came back home and the first thing I wanted to do was sing this song. My headphones are awesome, gave me what I needed and as I sang those high pitch lines loudly in my coarse voice, spears and arrows literally rained on my roomies. But I am happy, my soul is having an ice-cream. Gave a beautiful funda to Uru about how future is bright for us and gloomy for the chixx. The adrenaline is still there and thats why I am writing this now. If this seems like forced humor to you, welcome to my world. Was watching Kismat connection (only completed the 1st half)and trying to laugh but none came out.

So quiet no matter how loud

When you are well and one of the healthiest people around, world is your joystick. Move it around and the game of life rolls happily. But then you are asleep one fine day and something feels weird. The sun is shining down your face and wants to burn you alive. You shout out, Aarghh, shsdwd what the fudge, turn around, pull the blanket on your face and go back to the happy land. A guy wearing a black coat and a fiendish smile appears from nowhere and whispers in your right ear, "Dude, I know that you are happy and riding the Batmobile in your fucking dream, but isn't it the payday. I hope you have the money or I am gonna have to cut your balls off." You wake up startled, hoping to save your balls with a witty dialogue. But alas, the man in black with no face but a smile is gone. You feel relieved and disappointed at the same time. Relieved that you are safe but disappointed coz it was just a stupid dream and you don't have the chance to make that ingenious exchange that you had thought of. And you are back in the stupid real world.

Now I start narrating for myself, rather than allowing the stupid melodramatic loser paint a story around my normal life. So, I wake up and look at my mobile phone cum watch and my eyes pop out. Its freakin 12 PM and its a Wednesday. I should have been at work. I start thinking why the alarm didn't go off at 8 AM and right at that moment it starts buzzing. It was in snooze mode, going off every 15 minutes for a short time. I was confused but decided to ignore it and rush off to work. All along the way, I felt that things were hushed up a little. I could feel a strange kind of silence around me. A chic on bike almost hit me and then stared at me as if it was my fault. I shouted out, "You should have called". She looked back, fired a "Are you Drunk" look and went ahead. All the people around me also started staring. I thought they misunderstood me and tried to clarify by saying that "No, no I am not obsessed with her or anything. I was saying that she should have called, coming on your left so that I could have moved away." Anyway strange things continued to happen and I was feeling as if my brain was working way slower than usual and there was something heavy kept on the left side of my face.


OK enough with the mystery. I was having something which I like to call the "Near Deaf Experience". I had almost gone deaf in my left ear. The biggest advantage of this was that whenever my manager came to me, I would turn my left side towards him so that I don't have to listen to anything he says. Obviously, it would have worked like a charm if I had a nagging girlfriend and wanted to shunt out her boring blabber. But, when you are actually looking to meet new people (read chics), then trust me this situation is not very good and in addition, you are so conscious of the lack of hearing that you don't focus on other things and so keep on screwing things. You try to read their lips and people think that you wanna kiss them. I am thankful that I wasn't slapped. Anyhoo, after about 3 weeks, I thought that I had had enough and went to see a doctor anticipating the worse. But all i can say is, She came, she saw and she conquered. Yeah she was hawt and all, but I am talking about my medical problem here. It was a very stupid hardening of wax problem and she quickly cleared it. I started hearing all the voices in my head again and tried to make small talk with the doc by saying, "If its bad, then why the hell do they sell q-tips" and she was like "Dont be such a baby, want a candy?". She didn't say that actually but could have.

So, it was over and now I can hear more than I wanted to. Would be so nice to have filtering auditory senses. Seems lame huh? Yeah thought so. But then, if you have read till this point, you are lame :)

Vamos

So, after an epic battle Rafa finally accomplished what was expected of him. While IMO thats the blatant truth, it in no way underscores the enormity of his achievement, as might seem from the statement. Yes, he was expected to win, but then people are worn down by the burden of expectation and people thought that Roger would fight a lil and then yield as he normally does against Nadal. But this was Federer who was hungry to regain his lost ground and to win against an opponent of that quality must have been a very tough act even for the toughest man to wield a tennis racket. For the uninitiated, I am referring to the victory of Rafael Nadal at the All-England club for his first grand slam title on a surface other than clay.

I am a big Roger Federer fan, so I was obviously very upset when he suffered such a hard loss on his favourite surface and was denied a unique place in the record books (it looks unlikely that he would go on to win 6 in a row from here on). But anyone who saw the match couldn't help but say Vamos for Rafa. The dude has come such a long way from his early days as a powerful clay courter. There is a marked improvement in every facet of his game (except for his athleticism...he cant do more than that). But, I have always felt that the key to his success is his phenomenal mental strength. He plays one point at a time and never ever buckles under pressure (4th set tie-breaker yesterday was an anomaly). Thats so hard to do when you are facing break points. Especially in his matches against Federer, while Federer tries to do something extra and messes up when holding break points or gives it away (mostly) meekly when facing a couple of break points, Nadal always seems calm and does well at such crucial junctures.

It also doesn't hurt if you are insanely athletic and can chase down ball after ball from seemingly unrecoverable positions and then turn them into winners. What could have Roger done against this wall of steel. Well what he was able to do was almost enough and thats a tribute to the skill of this man. If he could have cut down on his errors a little bit, its possible that he might have won (not necessarily, just a possibility). It was his chance to get back on all the people who have repeatedly taken swipes at his level of play in the recent few months. I don't think that his level of play has gone down, its just that Rafa is much better than he was some time back and currently he is probably the best player on tour. But the modest guy that he is, Rafa credits Federer with the "best player in history" title even after defeating him so many times and never ever says that he is better than him (Djokovic has got to learn somethin from Rafa). I think even Federer is not that modest. He never ever says that Nadal is better than him, even on clay and expects himself to defeat him on any surface (dude u gotta be kidding me....its almost impossible to beat Nadal on clay).

One more thing which I wanted to add about the "match of a generation" is that although the rain delays were a source of frustration for all the people, I think it was because of the delays that both the players remained physically fresh and could play their best even in the fifth set. I can't imagine them playing the way they did if it was a continuous match (especially Roger). Anyhoo, bahut ho gaya match ka pulao...bas mentos khao aur dimaag ki bati jalao..

ps: check out Jaane tu ya jaane naa...Ekdam mast movie hai...

The Revival

This blog seems to be dying and I have been feelin low lately, but underdogs have to get up nd slam the heavyweights and thats how nature takes its course, so I decided to pen down somethin even if its absolutely ridiculous (when is it not??)

So, today I was feeling absolutely low and I couldnt figure out what was wrong with me. This does happen to me a lot of times and somehow for no reason I get depressed. Maybe its the lack of lady love in my life or the excess of academic bonanza around me which drives me crazy, somehow for no apparent reason I go down and nothing seems to have any purpose. Then alchohol gives me perspective and so I am returning to Sunny and so probably Sunny will represent me more than he ever does.

Sunny was surprisingly laying low even though he had done things and evidenced situations which demanded a rewrite of the boring village history. There was a certain nerdiness in the air which drove him mad. People all around him had suddenly delved into books and some weird creatures they called kampooter....They were always staring at it as if it would come alive anytime and eat their solemn paapads. They were living a life of terror and had no time to share his idiosyncracies. He tried to tell them that a great sage had once preached that "Jeene ke hain chaar din, baaki hain bekaar din" but somehow nobody listened and dismissed it as if it was Salman Khan starrer bandhan with Jackie yelling out bidu apun ka salaam..apun ko bas chai bidi de aur apun hai gulaam.

Sunny thought that he would be so happy to return to the familiar grounds. He could indulge people in frivolous banter, have fun with no worries whatsoever and when time came (Dussehra ka akhada) show his might, but he was wrong. The village seemed as alien as the riches of a foreign land. He could no longer cheat people into buying him a pink colored towel or a brand new razor. They all wanted to revolutionize mankind by reading books and publishing incremental papers. This vogue was infact brought about by Lalchiram who published a paper slamming all the developed countries for making satellites since the world was flat (as stated by Friedman) and demanded millions of dollars in compensation from their governments.

All this geeky talk disturbed Sunny. If he would have known that his village would turn this way, he would have happily sung Superman and Lady (http://youtube.com/watch?v=7-9ORkqqEJQ)
with vishkanya Tara and danced his way into immortality. Alas, it was not to be. In order to koohl down he decided to play the dehati version of tennis, but only Shamshera played the game with Duggi. Also, during his adventures Sunny had watched this amazing movie called "Taare Zameen Par" and had realized that he had motor impairment, which effected his reflexes. So,
it was extremely foolish to challenge Shamshera, but then life becomes so morose if you leave out foolish acts and so Sunny sold his farmland to buy a racket and challenged Shamshera.

Next time lets see if the story tries to have a touch of reality or flies off again to fantasy island. Till then lets remember Love Machine Shudhir who brought the real mean villian to the Indian screen without being tacky (prade sirf tu hi samajh sakta hai ye )

Chapter 5: How quick is the sand?

Recap : Last week we saw that Sunny saved his friends from the tiger by performing the greatest ever Nag Dance. His vocal presence was too enchanting to be resisted by Tara who went and smooched him which almost killed Sunny and now the story continues.

It started with utmost bliss and probably the end feeling was the same. But, it was sandwiched between pain which can only be experienced in the wildest of nightmares. The poison maimed and mutilated his mind and body and he only wished that the angel of death be his guest and that too asap. But, as it always happened something came in the way (gawd cant he just die and I wont have to write this stupid story again). Water started flowing in his system and magically offset the effect of poison, but it wasnt just water inside him, it was all over him as if he was being flooded. He opened his eyes and was startled to see a huge collection of people around him (most of em crying and a few cheering). His hands were tied down and he saw Shamshera coming in to the picture saying "Nanga nahayega kya Nichode gaa kya" and splashing some more water on him.

This was unbelievable. Were all his adventures just a figment of his imagination? He didnt think so. It seemed too real to be a dream. Still he had to deal with his present in order to figure out what had transpired. What he saw ahead took his breath away. It was the dreaded scene of an emaciated old man (dmk of the past) on a BSA SLR classic bicycle charging towards him(you might think what the freck). It was the fastest killer machine in the village, but wait speed was never the point. Actually, the man was carrying a bag of Ambuja cement with an X inscribed in red ink and that literally spelled doom. This killer combo had crushed to pieces whole armies of trucks and ants, so was used for the harshest punishments meted out by the Panchayat these days.

Sunny somehow knew that he was in possession of supernatural powers. To test his belief, he hit the ground hard and to his amazement, saw a shiver run through the ground and he was kinda hoping that it would blow away the impending danger. But, the killer stood firm. After all, Ambuja Cement Mazbooti ka Doosra Naam hai. He now knew that his time was up and since he had this thought, just as a last wish he asked what was the time. Since it was a last wish, everybody looked at their watch, including the man on the killer bike and this caused the powerful bag to slide down the bike into the adjacent pool of sand. But wait, it was no ordinary sand, it was quicksand and the more the weight, the faster the sand slides and since the Cement had the weight of belief it sunk faster than the rock of love in an ocean.

So, Sunny lives to kill (aunties) again and thats it for this week. I surely will b byack with some more stuff. Till then, say Saa say Ree and then say Whos ur Daddy SaaRee? (Lame!!)

Musings - Kisse pyaar karoon

Lets leave Sunny alone for some time. I am sure he is pissed with me for making him do all kinds of crazy things, so I will let him have a breather before we start screwing with his life again. Now, I generally had some random thoughts, so I thought lets pen it down. Now, when I say random thoughts please dont start thinking about fine nuances of life and deep abstract thoughts. Let me tell you that I am a very superficial guy. I dont make keen observations, dont really like detailed conversations on how things work and how nature is mysteriously awesome. I like booze, gossip, and frivoulous merrymaking. So, now that you know how hollow I am (or atleast I am pretending to be), we are on the same page and so I can talk about a meaningless personal angle I have with the TV series I am watching lately.

In most of the TV series I am watching these days, I tend to fall for one female character and I absolutely get in love with her till that series lasts and after that its all gone. A new series comes along and you know the pattern. Now, I have watched so many series till now, but I dont seem to remember my crushes (the ones from TV) for long. So, I decided that I will atleast put down the ones which are recent so that when I am old (and the world has survived the Nucleur Holocaust and dinosaurs dont come back), I can look back and see how stupid I was.

So, of the present crushes...starting with Scrubs, Dr. Elliot Reid is sweet (who am I kidding, she is actually pretty irritating sometimes, but man she is hawt and I dont really know why I love her). In Prison Break, I fell for Dr. Sarah Tancredi..now she was actually sweet, beautiful, intelligent and what not. An awesome character and I was so pissed when the directors (or whoever calls the shots) decided to kill her in the 3rd season. My most recent fall has been for Robin Scherbatsky, from How I met your mother (its the name of a series..some people thought that I was actually gettin on to a Yo Mama joke). Again some endearing traits there, but I wont go into the details for the sake of people who might accidently hit this page.

Thats it for now. Its all so random and it obviously wont make sense to a lot of people, but still remember that I am a hollow guy and the world badly needs hollow people in order to float through space, so try not to kill me.

Chapter 4: The Kiss of Death

Recap : Last week we saw that Sunny suddenly found himself in a Jungle and befriended a herd of Buffaloes. To save his friends, he challenged the tiger preying on them to a duel of Pulli Dance to which the tiger responded energetically and now the story continues :

Dhariwal had mesmerized the jungle junta with his performance. It was a memorable item number and it looked as if the crowd had fallen into a spell. Every damn creature was cheering, except for the buffaloes, who knew that only something special from Sunny could save them. Sunny remembered his Papa (he was probably getting drunk in vegas) and stepped into the arena. He planted his feet and then blurted out something, upon which snakes from all corners of the forest came running. The spectacle that followed was unprecedented. Sunny Paaji in the company of snakes then performed the best ever Naag Dance the wild world had ever witnessed. Everybody started dancing to the tune of "Mai teri Dushman, Dushman tu Mera... Mai Nagin tu Shera (tiger)" and even Sridevi would have felt embarrassed watching this.

Well the big question in your minds must be who will judge this freakinly close contest. The animals were clever, they knew that in case the duel could not be decided by a simple shout of 'Aye', they needed to have a judging panel and so they had called upon Vishkanya 'Tara' (from the famous series Chandrakanta, in which Chandrakanta hardly ever showed up) and Saroj Khan (dikhawe pe mat jao...apni akal lagao..so imagine an extremely hawt female here) who was an experienced judge (Nach Baliye) to call the shots. But this ploy clearly backfired as the panel was split on verdict. While, Saroj Khan threw coins and showed her appreciation for Dhariwal by whistling away, Tara definitely enjoyed the Naag dance as she could relate more to it. But the situation was not all that grim coz the animals anticipated a CAT fight and were all looking straight at the judges with their tongues hanging out.

While the cat fight raged on, the buffaloes asked Sunny about the Naag Dance. Instead of being thankful for giving it his best shot, they were mad at him for not doing their traditional Mooh Mooh dance and were jealous of the snakes. Sunny then told them that even he didnt know what happened, suddenly the snakes came from nowhere and since he was afriad of them, he just moved his body to shoo them away and scare them. At that very instant, the tiger complained that Sunny performed a Naag dance whereas he had challenged him to a Pulli dance, so technically he had lost. Listening to this argument, the buffaloes started shivering but then Sunny rose and with his bloodshot eyes, shouted out, "Kya ek rule tod dega to Sunny sher se haar jayega, kya saamp jaanwar nahi hote aur bhains insaan nahi hote" (Hinglish : break the rules, Sunny not loose, no?? snake no animal ? buffalo no human..waat do u say man?) The entire wild life just stood speechless. The thunderous burst left no doubt about who the winner was. The tiger ran away with tears all over its face and it was a joyous moment for buffaloes. Tara was so impressed with Sunny that she couldnt hold herself and ran towards Sunny, grabbed his hair and gave him the kiss of his life. It was all good and everybody was cheering (and making vulgar comments), but suddenly Sunny`s face started turning pale as if life was being sucked out of him and a Buffalo shouted out, "Arey ye to Vishkanya hai"

Thats all I could come up with this week. But as you may have guessed by now, this story would not end so quickly. After all I am from the land of Balaji Telefilms, so stay tuned so that I can bring in more hot babes (and ofcourse CAT fights...the one this time was pretty lame though) to keep the fire glowing within :)